Confessions of a Fashionphobic

Meeting in one hour.
I open my closet and see my new line of clothing collection, all neatly stacked and piled up according to brand, color, size, and texture.
Let's see... LV, Polo, Armani, K&K, Crocodile...
Which one should I wear?











The Ralph Lauren Tennis Sweater OR the LV Sweater (Limited Edition)?

After taking one hour of hard decision-making moments, I decided to go with an LV sweater, the Calvin Klein underwear (decided to pull it a bit up so girls can drool over me when i bend over), Banana Republic jeans (low cut, you know why XD) and Gucci shoes with matching purple socks.
I walk slowly through the bustling crowd, hair ruffling in the wind while my Prada sunglasses catch a glimpse of sunlight every now and then.
I reach the store and I find my friends waiting impatiently for me.
"Sorry guys for being fashionably late."
I look at my Tissot watch, it's been two hours and I'm not sorry.

Yeah, right.

I have only ONE style. (T-shirt + Sweater+ Trousers)

I don't own a pair of jeans.

I haven't bought a piece of clothing from Dunners since last year.

I spent $0 so far in terms of clothing or any form of accessories.

I ONLY have dark-colored clothes (apart from a bright orange sweater that I seldom wear) because I don't have to worry about color coordination since they all look the same.

More than two people have been wanting to style me and buy me clothes ==

I don't own a pair of shades, but clip-on sunglasses.

My tube of gel (bought in 2005) is still 70% filled.

Yes, confessions confessions.... :(